Last Resort

A song about voting and how people pretend to be your friend / care at voting time just to get themselves in. Say for example politicians only call round your house every 3.5 years.


[INTRO]

[VERSE1]
As a last resort I've broken my life into manageable chunks
And a previous constituent said that they didn't give a fuck

It's time to vote to make a choice about my future state
No party gives me joy so I'm going with the bunch that offers minimals of hate

[CHORUS]
Oh let's pretend we love each other for 5 minutes
at the voting booth of fate you can count on my vote, you'll be the winner
There's not much in it you've managed a joy Division
Let's pretend everything's gonna be alright

[VERSE 2]
As a last resort I've lied my way to this position
And we all know the cohort at number 10 don't give a flying fuck

It's time to vote to make a choice about your future state
They're the party of hate but they're promising joy on the other side.

[CHORUS]
Oh let's pretend we love each other for 5 minutes
On the doorstep of doom can I count on your vote, I'll be the winner
There's not much in it, but I promise a joy provision.
Let's pretend everything's gonna be fine.

[INTERLUDE]
I'm available
There's a knock on the door
You've been invisible for
3.5 years

You start jabbering
As I undo the lock
you want me to put
my X in your box

[BRIDGE]
Your party offers minimal hate
So you might have a chance with me mate

[FINAL FUN CHORUS based on Blind Vision - Queen]
Oh let's pretend it's chicken and chips for dinner
On the menu of life you can count on my vote, you'll be the winner
There's not much in it, but you promised a joy provision.
Let's pretend your going to fix my life.

[STOP] 

NSFW - Your Tweets Look Pretty Tonight

A song about how my Twitter timeline became a cesspit, how I managed to clean it up and my progress towards Internet hygiene. For those in the know NSFW stands for Not Safe For Work :-)


[INTRO]

[VERSE 1]
When Zuck invented Facebook
it enabled us to take take a look
at all the other girls in town

There was nothing better
then Jack invented twitter
and now we gets to chat the world around

[CHORUS]
Hey you, your tweets look pretty tonight
Hey yeah yeah
Hey you, your tweets look pretty tonight
Hey hell yeah

[VERSE 2]
Cause I don't do dick picks
my tweets don't look half as slick
i have to charm the ladies with sound

but when no one is listening
my timeline is a glistening
with disco from the world around

[CHORUS]
Hey you, your tweets look pretty tonight
Hey yeah yeah
Hey you, your tweets look pretty tonight
Hey hell yeah

[INTERLUDE]
It started off
the messages were text type
Then then then the messages [went on to] were sext type
my timeline hit the gutter
it wasn't getting better
it was
NSFW
NSFW

[RESOLVE]
So I had to go in rehab home
get myself a feature phone
and now my life is back
on track

[CHORUS]
Hey you, your tweets look pretty tonight
Hey yeah yeah
Hey you, your tweets look pretty tonight
Hey hell yeah

[RELAX]
NSFW. NSFW
NSFW, NSFW

[CHORUS]
Hey you, your tweets look pretty tonight
Hey yeah yeah
Hey you, your tweets look pretty tonight
Hey hell yeah

[SUMMARY VERSE]
You know its not safe for work
Your life could get much worse
[So keep] your keyboard clean and dry

[But] who am I to dictate
I'm only trying to save face
promoting safer practice
online

[CHORUS]
Hey you, your tweets look pretty tonight
Hey yeah yeah
Hey you, your tweets look pretty tonight
Hey hell yeah

[SYNTH SOLO !!]

[BUILD UP TO FINALE]
NSFW, NSFW Hey Hey Hey

[ Final Chorus ]

[RAMBLINGS and LESSONS LEARNED]